Tuesday, February 2, 2010

The Nuts And Bolts Of Positive Thinking

Positive thinking is one of the most "used" concepts in our society, but it's also one of the most misunderstood. The idea of it is easy. Something goes wrong all you have to do is "think" positive and everything will be allllll better. Well, guess what? If your dog decides to forget his potty training and relieve himself on the floor, I'm not too sure you'll just think positively and it will magically clean itself up. That's the funny thing about this concept. There needs to be "positive doing" involved in this thought process. We have this belief that if we think happy thoughts about the result we are getting, something will change. If there is no internal paradigm shift, we will always use the "programs" that we've used our whole life. I'm not sure who said this, but it makes perfect sense.

"The definition of insanity is doing the same things over and over, but expecting different results."

My goal is to point out what really needs to happen to make this concept work. There is more to it than the average person would think. We forget about or have no clue what tools there are that we need to make this a permentant change! For example, understanding how our brain works, knowing why we act the way we do, and the application of universal principles is needed in this recipie of success. If these things aren't a part of the process, we will find oursevels with temperary or no change at all. An open mind is going to be needed to make this shift in our conciousness. Consciousness is the quality of the mind that includes your own internal reality, which also determines how you experience the world.

How many times have you had a situation that you perceive as "bad" happen and then try to think positively and made it all better? It might have been changed for a short period of time, but the only person you can't fool in this world is yourself! These thoughts of doubt, fear and anxiety are still running around in your head like annoying kids that won't shut up! The more you try to get them to stop the louder they get. Raise your hand if you have ever had that happen. If you have anything attached to your shoulder that resembles an arm your hand should be up. We have been given this amazing tool, our brain, but we never received the instruction manual for it! How do we make positive thinking actually work? To understand this we need to learn a little bit more about ourselves and how we operate.

Generally speaking, we have 50,000 thoughts per day. If you were to sit back and observe your thoughts and your self talk, how many of them do you think are actually positive? Odds are not very many. There are two types of thoughts that we have; CON-structive and DE-structive. What is the difference? Constructive thoughts are the ones that we have when we are thinking positivly. They serve us and have our best interest in mind. Destructive thoughts are the ones that limit us. Most of the time it is when "logic" is entered in to the equation. How many times have you been doing something and thought, "This is too good to be true?" or "I never have good luck.". Again, if you have an arm it should be in the air. If we haven't programed ourselves for "positivity" we will sabotage ourselves! Guess what?! That self talk is your BELIF system starring you right in the face! Our reality is created by different things. One of them is our belief system. Our belief systems are neural networks created in our brains through past experiences, childhood, and programs that we've attained over a lifetime.

"What fires together, wires together."

This means that different events that had a significant amount of emotion added to it were connected to create a reality for you. If you were bitten by a dog when you were younger you had a new neural network created. You will ALWAYS fear dogs at any age in your life until you "re-wire" your brain. If you were in love and had a terrible break-up, it will probably wire you to feel gun shy to date for awhile. Do you remember a converstation with your dad when you were 14 years old about fishing? Probably not, unless it had a significant emotion attached to it. Take a second and relect on your memories from your past. Which ones do you remember?If you ask 10 people who were part of the same past experience, why is it that some of them will remember the event and some of them won't? The answer is simple. Different people remember different things depending on the emotional influence it had on them.

Let me ask you this. How can we expect these "positive" thoughts to be permenanent if our belief system has wired our brain to be negative? That's like saying that you have downloaded only the basic version of microsoft word, but expect it to perform the tasks of the advanced version! Our belief systems can't give what they don't have. Here's the natural progression of belief systems.

Belief -->> Habit -->> achievement of current reality

Remember, perception is reality. Our reality filters through our past experiences. If we have had negative life experiences, we will visualize the world as a terrible place that never lets you get ahead. If you have had positive life experiences, then you will view the world as a place full of limitless possibilities.

Another point about the brain that is very important is how it attaches things to stored "files". For example, I am going to say different words and I want you to see what happens. The object is to think of the first thing that comes to your head. Take 10 seconds and think of that word and see what happens.

"Basketball"

What did you think about? Was it just the word? NO! It was probably a picture or a mental movie. This probably lead to a basketball related memory you might have had. If you aren't an athlete or have any clue what a basketball is, you probably didn't have too many attaching thoughts. Lets try it again.

"PIPSISSEWA"

What did you think about there? Is this jibberish I just randomly came up with? What did you attach to this word? I'm going to guess not too many people know what this is. It's actually a plant. The Native American name of this plant means 'it breaks into small pieces, because the leather-like evergreen leaves were used in medicine to dissolve kidney stones. Known for its strengthening properties and used in medicines for diseases of the eye. An infusion was made with water and applied to heal blisters. If you aren't a plant lover, there's no way you can attach anything to this word that is related to the definition. You might have attached something else to it, but it's only something that you have in your "files" in your brain. You can't choose files from a cabinet you don't have! I hope you understand the idea of attachment now. Now, how is this even related to positive thinking? Lets start putting it together.

"We will attach a negative or positive thought to a belief that we have created through our experiences and views of what reality is. "

Our "Reticular Activation System" (RAS) is what our brain uses to point out what is important to us at that particular time. If you are considering buying a Chevy, you'll start to notice Chevy's all over the place! Did everyone all the sudden feel the need to buy a Chevy? NO! They were there all the time and you didn't notice them because it wasn't important to you at the time. If you are interested in cars, you probably aren't going to notice all the different types of birds in the area. Who cares!? Your focus will be on the crisp paint job of the hot rod that just drove by. Unless there is always bird crap on the cars you are looking at, you'll never notice birds! With this concept learned, now we can fit it into the puzzle.

"We will attach a negative or positive thought to a belief that we have created through our experiences and views of what reality is that is given to us by focusing on what is important to us at the time. "

Positive thinking needs to be practiced on a daily basis and also needs to be evaluated. Without consistent work, we will revert back to what we have always thought. If you look at your mind as a garden we are either planting flowers or pulling weeds. Planting flowers refers to putting in positive things in our consciousness. Since we are constantly being "programmed" it is important to filter what goes in. What comes out can only reflect what has gone in. Either you let the news program your reality or you read inspirational literature. It's your call. Lets say that you get on a positive thinking kick. For about 2 months you are happier, your relationships are better, and you notice life is good! What if something bad happens? What does your thought process do? Do you fall off of your mountain and go into a valley or do you stay centered. Realize that sometimes things aren't going to go as planned. How you react to the situation is going to determine what you REALLY believe about your "positive attitude."

"Consistent efforts don't always yield results, but they ALWAYS yield success"

-Duane McGill

This concept was brought to my attention by a great friend and mentor of mine, Duane Mcgill. If we let a situation get us too low or too high, we become imbalanced. When we are imbalanced we become irrational. If we are too high, we think we can do more than we are capable of. If we are too low, our self image is damaged and our confidence in our ability lowers. Staying centered allows us to make it though anything. This will lead me to topic of self-righteous vs. self-wrongness. When you think that you're more positive than negative, you get self-righteous and build yourself up, and when you see more negatives than positives, you get self-wrongness and beat yourself down. When you're up, you feel elated and act self-righteously and superior toward other people; and when you're down, you feel depressed and act self-wrongeously and inferior. It is very dangerous to be on the extremes! For example, if you try to put on a facade for the world about how positive and upbeat you are, there will be chaos in your private life or your personal health. Everything is in perfect balance. This statement by John Demartini sums up an amazing point.

"When you stop taking credit and blame, you have the potential to become present, and in that state of presence, you're capable of what most people call miracles."

Demartini also goes on to say, "Every time you splinter yourself into a positive and negative emotion, you scatter your light, dissipate your energy potential, and disempower your true and centered being. In this way, you separate yourself into past and future, and you're no longer present."

We attract everything into our life. We only see what our perception of reality is. We could have an amazing person that crosses our path that could help us accomplish our dreams, but if we aren't on a higher plane of awareness, we'll miss them. If a situation or circumstance has been delivered to us we will miss it unless we are looking for it. Positive thinking isn't just about doing it when we want something. It's about making it a habitual process of life. You can read about the successful people who "got it." They are usually the people who were told something couldn't be done and they fought through it anyway because their vision on the inside was more powerful than the obstacles on the outside. People such as the Wright brothers, Henry Ford, Dale Carnegie, Thomas Edison, Benjamin Franklin or anyone else who has done something significant in history. Authur Schopenhaur once said, "All great truth passes through three stages: First, it is ridiculed. Second, it is violently opposed. Third, it is accepted as being self-evident."

Will positive thinking work for you? The answer is up to you. It is your personal responsibility. Jack Canfield, author of Chicken Soup For The Soul, has a great line that fits beautifully.

"You can't change the circumstances, the seasons, or the wind. You can only change yourself."

Change is what happens when the pain of remaining the same becomes greater than the pain of changing. If you want positive thinking to work, plant flowers. Look around and do an honest self evaluation. You must remove what is hindering. Who are the types of people you hang around? What do you do for entertainment? What are your habits? What are your hobbies? Remember, the quality of your life is determined by the quality of questions you ask. What have you been asking lately?

Sunday, January 17, 2010

I Have A Dream

History tells us that in every age there comes a time when leaders must come forth to meet the needs of the hour. Therefore, there is no potential leader who does not have an opportunity to better mankind. Those around him also have the same privilege. Fortunately, I believe God has surrounded me with those who will accept the challenge of this hour.

My dream allows me to give up, at any moment, all that I am in order to receive all that I can become.

My dream allows me to sense the invisible so I can do the impossible

My dream allows me to trust God's resources since the dream is bigger than all my abilities and acquaintances.

My dream allows me to continue when discouraged, for where there is no faith in the future, there is no power in the present.

My dream allows me to attract winners because big dreams draw big people.

My dream allows me to see myself and all my people in the future. Our dream is the promise of what we shall one day be.

Yes, I have a dream. It is greater than any of my gifts. It is as large as the world, but it begins with one.

Won't you join me?

Wednesday, January 13, 2010

Why "The Bridge Epiphany"?

When someone comes to this page and see the words "The bridge Epiphany" it made me wonder if they understood what it meant. It's quite simple. I hope it makes sense, too. Before I answer that question, I want to give a personal example why I came up with it. Like everyone else, I had a childhood that shaped who I became. I didn't have a rough life or anything like a lot of people, but actually the opposite. I didn't feel like I had to deal with a hard time at all because my parents were my filter for that. Looking back I realized I was pretty blind to a lot of things.

I went through high school and college with the programming I received from my parents, friends, teachers, coaches and church leaders from the past. My visions were big, but they were also very limited. We pick from "programs" that we have been giving to us. Like the people who influenced our influencers, they can only give what they have. They all meant well, but sometimes it's not everything we need to become more. Much like a computer, our subconscious mind downloads programs in which we act upon. We can't use programs that we don't have! Once we understand where we got those files and see how they serve us we can start to co-create with our divine intelligence. Take a second and reflect on some programs or files you have. How do you think? Are you always looking hoping for the best but expecting the worst? Do you have a hell of a time being organized? Do you have habits that do not serve you and you feel they are always getting in the way from you being successful? The list is endless. Once we find out that we have the ability to change those programs we open the door to a world that you only see on the screen of your mind.

The term "What you see is what you get" is actually very true on a lot of levels. It's a cliche that people use when they describe themselves as they try to show their "independence" or if they are on a "self righteous rebellion". Lets take it a little deeper. When we close our eyes we can play whatever "movie" we want. If you want to go to Paris you could visualize the architecture or the Eiffel tower. OH NO! King Kong is climbing it with a lady in his hand! You'd never believe who it is...It's Lady GaGa! Look! there I am on the ground looking up screaming, "DROP HER! Your music is annoying!" The mighty Kong is swatting at airplanes as Maverick and Goose try to maneuver around his violent motions. I'm sure you get the point. We can watch any movie we want.
Lets apply this to your life. What do you really want? What type of career would be a dream for you? What kind of car do you want to drive. What kind of house do you want to live in? What kind of charity or mission trip do you want to be a part of. It's all something you can think of in your head. What movies are you playing? Are they big dreams or are they small hopes? Why not play what you REALLY want? Your brain can't tell the difference from a real life event or one you vividly imagine. Here's the best example I can give and if I offend anyone I am sorry. I'm going to use a "wet dream". We exert bodily functions that normally take some kind of physical actions. Most young boys are laying in bed by themselves and all the sudden they make a dream so real that their brain thinks it really happening and boom goes the dynamite! Our brain is a very powerful tool. The unfortunate thing is we aren't handed an operations manual for it.

Your mind is limitless and full of infinite potential. How the hell do we get it out of our head and in to our lives!? This is the point of my blog venture. I want to build a community of people from all walks of life that can come together and create a foundation from which we can all benefit. I'm only 25 years old, but I have met some amazing people. I have been introduced to some new "programs" that have definitely served me and have changed my life. Most people who haven't seen me since college would NEVER in a million years think that I would be talking this way in a serious sense. I was the guy who did only what I needed to get by in class, went to practice and messed around and then did a bunch of crazy stuff people would never think of doing. If there was something stupid that needed to be done the common thought process was, "Go get Ortie, he'll do it!" My friends programmed me to believe, "Ya, i'm that guy! I'm supposed to do that stuff! What do you want me to do?" I've definitely grown up a lot! Now I feel that I understand my purpose a little more. It is constantly unraveling, just like many others do. I was taught that "Knowledge without application is entertainment" by a wise old man, but what I have learned is to take it a step farther.

"Knowledge without evaluated experience is ignorance"

When I first learned universal principles to help me be successful I thought I had it all figured out. It wasn't until I had humbling experiences that made me finally understand what the knowledge was really about. I went and ran 10 gyms in Florida for a short period of time that humbled me. I later moved to Arizona and was also humbled. When I got back to Omaha I had a new appreciation and gratitude for what I had. I looked back on all the lessons I learned and experiences I had and tried to find the benefit from each of them, even if they seemed terrible. It's my belief that we learn the lessons we need in our darkest times. It's easy to be positive and feel good about things when things are going well, but the second they start going bad is where you find out what you REALLY believe! I encourage you to look back on different experiences and find how you reacted and see if they served you. Only then can you evaluate what you "know" and truly understand what these success principles mean.

When put all together, the bridge epiphany is meant to connect our inner world of hopes and dreams with our outer reality. The bridge is where the community comes in to play. Each principle will serve as another beam or brick that you can use to construct this master piece. Everyone needs different pieces to their bridge. Everyones bridge will look different. In the end, we all have the ability to cross it. The more sturdy your bridge is, the more likely it will stand the test of time. Let us all to put on our hard hats and work as a team!

"If a man for whatever reason has the opportunity to lead an extraordinary life he has no right to keep it to himself"

- Jacques-Yves Cousteau

Attached is a link that will help understand where we get our programs. Shad Helmstetter is one of the authors I have on the bottom of the screen. His book What to say when you talk to yourself is a great way to start with your bridge.


The Story Of Self Talk

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rvzfnm9uk-0

Monday, January 11, 2010

Why Positive Thinking SUCKS!

The first thing I want everyone to understand is that this isn't a positive thinking blog. We could sit here all day and talk about rainbows and unicorns while eating bubble gum pies giggling about jokes that have a punch line of "could you please pass the peace pipe", but we won't. That might get people happy for a short time, but when the next day comes you won't remember what you were happy about. My goal is to give nuggets of information that you can use that stick with you and most importantly WORK! I want you understand that everything that I will ever say in these blogs will reflect one person's experience...MINE. I want people to take what they need and leave what they don't. The last thing I want you to do is blindly absorb information without thinking about it. Albert Einstein hit a homer with this statement, which after reading made a lot of sense;

"You have to remain critically vigilant. Question every premise, challenge conventional wisdom and never accept the truth of something mearly because everyone else views it as obvious. Resist being credulous".

What the hell does credulous mean? I thought the same thing. Let me help. Credulous means willing to believe or trust too readily, especially without proper or adequate evidence. Basically it means gullible. There's a lot of people who are probably shocked that I would say something like this and agree with Mr. Einstein (mainly my roommate, Adam, because if it's shiny and sparkly I NEED it!), but one of my resolutions this year is to think for myself and ask my own questions. It's too easy to read something and look at it as truth. I have the most wonderful mentor and absolutely hang on every word that comes out of his mouth. Not too long ago I noticed something. For the first time I had someone challenge something he taught me. My ego immediately started playing defense like it was trying to shut down Kobe Bryant for the last shot of the NBA finals. We are NOT our ego, but that's for another blog. That's when I had the "ah ha" moment. I wasn't thinking for myself. I never questioned anything that I read or that was taught to me. Questioning it doesn't mean not believe it, but rather try to understand why the belief is the way it is. We need to keep a beginners mind. The mind of a beginner has options of many, but the mind of an expert has options of few. When we close our mental doors on different points of view, we can't learn. We are either growing or dying.

Here is a review I wrote online about two years ago. It's simple and to the point.

"It's important that everyone understands that positive thinking sucks. I know, it's the most ridiculous thing you've ever heard. Let me explain. When people "think positive" and ONLY think positive, it can prove to be destructive. Think about it. When is the last time you thought positive and then had numerous things go wrong from which you were thinking? What will happen next is you then start abandoning your previous positive thoughts and trade them in for passionate, negative thoughts and feelings. What needs to be done is internalization. This is positive thinking with an EMOTION added to it. By ONLY using positive thinking you keep it from your neck up. Internalization thrives all throughout your body. You add a feeling to your thoughts and it imbeds it into your subconscious mind through auto-suggestion. This will allow you to not be so quick to abandon your positive state of mind. It's funny how a group of people could receive the same information and yet half of them would be successful with it. Knowledge without application is simply entertainment! Don't think just because you read a certain self help book you will have all of your life's problems solved. Take what you've learned and apply it. If it's not working, find someone who is where you want to be and has this knowledge and have them mentor you! If you WANT more you must BECOME more.

What I wanted to get across with this review of the book, "As a man thinketh" by James Allen, I wanted to show people how you can start to resent positive thinking if it's done wrong. It's a positive feeling. It's not positive thinking it's positive doing. Your deepest most inner thoughts become you outer most tangible realities. An athlete can THINK about being a great player, but it's the ones that ACT on those thoughts and add balanced emotion that are experiencing their inner world on the outside. The bridge between your inner and outer worlds is ACTION. Without it, all your positive thinking is just "good ideas." Heck, a 5 year old could look up at the sky and say, "I want to go to the moon!" HELL WHAT A GREAT IDEA! It's not the thought that gets us there, right Mr. Armstrong? Last time I checked a "step" was an action (no matter how small or giant). When logic is entered in to the equation, fear starts to take over and second guess the action. Here is a great acronym for fear; False Emotions Appearing Real.

"INFORMATION MAKES YOU THINK; EMOTION MAKES YOU ACT"

In the topics to come I challenge you to take what is said and think for a change. I don't want you to say, "I'm going to be positive today". I'd rather have you take the approach of being balanced. I will be going over my belief of everything is exactly as it should be. We just need to find the seed of benefit. I am going to stop myself so I don't go off and write the whole blog about that one subject!

Thoughts?



Sunday, January 10, 2010

The Dash

The Dash

I read of a man who stood to speak

At the funeral of a friend.

He referred to the dates on her tombstone

From the beginning…to the end.

He noted that first came her date of birth

And spoke the following date with tears,

But he said what mattered most of all

Was the dash between those years.

For that dash represents all the time

That she spent alive on earth…

And now only those who loved her

Know what that little line is worth.

For it matters not, how much we own;

The cars…the house…the cash,

What matters is how we live and love

And how we spend our dash.

So think about this long and hard…

Are there things you’d like to change?

For you never know how much time is left,

That can still be rearranged.

If we could just slow down enough

To consider what’s true and real,

And always try to understand

The way other people feel.

And be less quick to anger,

And show appreciation more

And love the people in our lives

Like we’ve never loved before.

If we treat each other with respect,

And more often wear a smile…

Remembering that this special dash

Might only last a little while.

So, when your eulogy’s being read

With your life’s actions to rehash…

Would you be proud of the things they say

About how you spent your dash?